Estate Planning as a Career

Some superstitions are harmless, like knocking on wood, carrying a rabbit’s foot or believing that if you get on a plane with your right foot, the plane won’t crash. I do this last one myself. Silly, but harmless.

Other superstitions are not so harmless and they affect other people as well. For example, the millions of husbands who are superstitious about estate planning and, therefore, refuse to do it. Or do it partway but won’t complete the process.

Ed and his wife Cynthia, worked with an attorney to set up their estate plan. Ed signed all the documents except for one - the durable powers of attorney. The papers have been sitting on his desk for over a month.

Cynthia is angry and feels helpless because of Ed’s continued delay. She feels like a hostage to Ed’s superstition that if he signs the durable powers of attorney papers, which are necessary to complete the process, God is watching and will snuff him out.

Because of Ed’s superstition, Cynthia won’t be able to act on his behalf if he can’t make medical or financial decisions for himself. Unless Ed signs the papers giving Cynthia the power to make those decisions, his adult children from his first marriage will be calling the shots, not always in Cynthia’s best interests.

“Ed signed the other papers but won’t sign the durable powers of attorney” Cynthia says. “He assures me he will, but when I remind him that the planning isn’t complete unless he does sign, he accuses me of nagging. He knows it’s not rational, but he says it makes him feel better.”

Is there any difference between that kind of thinking and not walking under a ladder, wearing garlic around your neck to protect you from vampires or crossing the street when you see a black cat?

When I was researching my book, I discovered in interviews that many men intentionally leave loose ends in their e (more…)